The Confrontation
by Necrosharpe
Summary: At the end of the first series Bette and Tina split. Here is how i imagine that Bette copes and trys to make amends for her actions. character development study
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER ONE

Bette Porter sat staring at the mass of paper work that occupied her desk. The various collection dates and invoices jumbled into an untidy heap. Instead of following her customary method of organising the various papers into an organised pile and then sorting into the gallery's various files, she simply sat head in hands unable to move. Outside the door Jimmy her junior assistant stood watching her with the delivery boy next to him.

"I wouldn't go in if I were you," Jimmy warned, holding his hand out for the package.

"What's up with her?" Dave asked, handing over a document envelope for Jimmy to sign for.

"Rumour on the great vine has it that she split up with her girlfriend last week, she has been a complete mess ever since."

Dave looked into to the room his head slightly cocked to one side. The he gave a startled look.

"That's the Bette Porter. The lesbian curator of the gallery?"

"The very same," Jimmy said.

"She was on TV a few weeks ago, had some perky blonde with her. I wouldn't have minded a bit of that I can tell you". He grinned at Jimmy who didn't smile back.

"Anyway," Dave added "I thought, well you know dykes didn't really go in for that whole long term thing."

Jimmy gave him a contemptuous look. "Actually she and her partner were together for 7 years before the split. In fact when you saw her appear on TV they had recently lost their child to a miscarriage!"

Dave looked taken aback and Jimmy blushed. It had been none of his business to say anything. If the truth be told he hadn't really known Bette and Tina that well. He had been introduced to them as a couple once or twice at various 'artsy' parties but had not known either of them very well. However he was very attached to Bette. She was a true task master and you had to be on your toes to get things right, but she also knew when to congratulate and praise which made it all the worth while. He also had never met anyone with such daring artistic vision. He thought back to the 'Provocations' exhibit that the gallery had been loaned a while ago. It had been a very daring series of works that many of the public had considered pornographic and blasphemous. Bette however had stuck to what she believed in and fought hard to get the gallery ready in time for the opening night. It had of course been a complete success. It was hard to believe that Leo the director of the board had wanted only a month prior to this to fire her.

Just as Jimmy drifted out of his day dream he saw Bette stumble slowly to her feet and grab her coat. As she left without saying a word Jimmy winced. He knew she had probably gone to lunch, but she should say something. What if Leo called to ask where she had gone? Just as he was thinking this the red light on his desk sparked to life and the phone rang.

"Hello."

"It's Leo, where is Bette? I can't seem to get hold of her on her desk phone and her mobile is off."

"I think she went to lunch sir, she said this morning she was having problems with her phone."

There was silence for a moment at the other end of the line. "When she gets in send her straight to my office please Jimmy."

"Ok sir," Jimmy added. He massaged his head with his hands. Bette, he thought, come on you need to pull it together.

Outside Bette walked blindly down the road. It was a warm day under the Californian sun, but Bette drew her coat more tightly around her, she always felt cold these days. She stopped a little way down the street and realised that she was outside The Planet Café. Looking through the windows she could see all the guys Alice, Shane, Dana and that awful Tonya. She couldn't believe that Dana was still with that psycho. A few weeks previously Alice had voiced her concern that Tonya may have been a grifter who had potentially killed Dana's beloved cat Mr Piddles. Bette remembered how Dana had tactfully broached the subject of getting another cat soon and Toya had swiftly turned the conversation aside to Dana's up and coming tennis tournament. Bette smiled to herself. It was the first smile she had allowed herself in days. Distractedly she looked over to the bar to see if Marina was serving and there she saw her. Tina had a tray of espressos clasped in her delicate hands, the dark blackness of the tray contrasting against the seductive paleness of her skin. She looked so normal, she looked so…happy. Bette felt sick, it was obscene had she meant nothing to her at all? How could Tina be so happy when she felt so miserable? There was a petite blonde girl hovering nervously around the table. Her eyes looked wide with awe at the group and she fiddled awkwardly with her fingers. Through the dark glass of the café's window Bette could make out she was wearing one of the 'Lesbian Wanted' t-shirts the girls had bought back from a recent party. She prayed that the woman was just another of Shane's conquests, oh please let her be with Shane.

Suddenly Bette felt lost. Where could she go, she dared not face The Planet. She walked quickly back down the road, stumbling over every obstacle. This wasn't like her, she was Bette Porter, and she always knew exactly what was going on. Her life was organised around her little black filo-fax and that meant that everything worked out. Only it wasn't was it? Dejectedly she looked up the street at the gallery entrance and then back at her watch. Although she had gone on lunch early she still had another fifteen minutes before she needed to be back, but also she could not face returning back to work just yet. Looking across the road she noticed a small bar. This was what Tina had done, she could not even get lunch at her traditional haunts anymore, Tina had turned her world upside down. Taking a last look back at the gallery Bette made her way down the dark steps into the bar's shaded entrance.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO

Even at two o'clock the bar was already noisy and thronging with women. The lights had been dimmed for atmospheric effect Bette presumed and fluorescent lighting glowed off the walls. Bette felt miserable. This was not her sort of place at all; it was the type of bar Shane might wake up in, normally with a new shag wrapped around her alchohol doused body. Still she was here now and sat herself down on a stool at the bar. There was a laminated drinks menu propped against the bar till and Bette scanned down the list unseeingly.

"What can I get you hunny?" She was being addressed by a tall, dark haired bar maid. Bette watched her arms, mesmerised by the intricate tattoo that designs that swam up her forearms. She decided that this was a definitely a Shane place and made to leave the stool. The bar maid looked at her for a minute as if she was checking her out.

"Let me get you a vodka, lemon and lime, you like you need it."

Bette smiled in spite of herself. Her dazzling smile revealing brilliant white teeth.

"Here you go," and handed a glass to Bette "I made it a double, its Elle by the way."

She grinned back and walked off to serve another customer. Bette downed the drink in one setting the glass heavily back onto the table. She gazed down at the ring on her finger, the two interlinked hoops of white gold. That ring had held so many promises and so many hopes for the future. What had become of them now? She had been poised along a parapet, tip-toeing step by step along its edge clinging desperately to the belief that she wouldn't fall. But what now, Candace that unexpected whirlwind had pushed her...

She wasn't able to finish her day dream as Elle bought her back to the present.

"Did that help you?" she asked, her green eyes looking deep into Bette

"Not really." Bette replied miserably.

Elle smiled a charming smile. Hopping over the counter she sat on the stool next to Bette, wiping her wet hands down her jeans as she did so.

"It's true what they say alcohol isn't the answer. However I am a very scientific lady, so just for the sake of continuity let's give it one more go."

She poured another drink for Bette and one for herself and looked hard at her.

"Forgive me for saying this," Elle said "But you don't really seem the type to be here, you're a bit of a suit."

Bette smiled meekly "I'm avoiding someone so I can't go to my usual Café."

"Is that so, well part of me is grateful but another part of me is curious. What _really_ causes you to be here?"

Bette shook her head, her big doleful eyes looking down at the bar.

Elle watched her for a minute then glanced down at Bette's hand. The skin surrounding her ring was red and swollen.

"You must really love her," Elle said quietly

Bette began to sob quietly, "Of course the problem was I never realised how much at the time."

Elle looked pitying at her "Try me, I am on my lunch break at the moment, I have time to spare."

Bette looked back at her and picked up her glass.

"Where do I begin…" She said

Bette stumbled back into the gallery. Her head was spinning and she desperately needed a glass of water. She saw Jimmy at the doorway looking white.

"Bette there you are I have been trying to get hold of you all afternoon. Where have you been? Leo has been on the warpath he wants to see you in his office right away."

Bette groaned. She had been expecting the worst but still. She swallowed the feeling of nausea that was waving up her throat.

"Thanks Jimmy, for everything I know how hard you're working trying to cover up for me." With that she made her way slowly down the labyrinth of corridors and knocked on Leo's door.

"Come in." The voice called out and Bette shakily opened the door handle.

"You wanted to see me?"

"Yes, yes here please have a seat." Leo motioned towards one of high backed leather chairs.

Bette sat down fighting to keep her composure. On Leo's desk sat a large jug of water which she gazed at longingly before drawing her attention back to him.

"Now Bette as you have probably realised you haven't been performing to your usural high standards recently."

Bette opened her mouth to speak but then shut it again and looked down.

"Now we are friends aren't we Bette. We have had our disagreements but also had our triumphs. Your success at Provocations proved beyond doubt that you are the curator to take us into 2005. We all want the California Art Gallery put on the map."

Bette thought she knew what was coming she started to fiddle anxiously with her ring. Leo continued,

"So I think that in light of your current erm… situation, it might be advisable to take a few weeks holiday."

Bette stared back at him, "Are you firing me?" she said in a quiet dry voice devoid of her usual exotic tones.

"Now nobody said anything about being fired. After all you're hard work getting Provocations ready a short break would be acceptable to anyone. However I feel that you more than anyone at this moment need a break."

Normally Bette would have agreed with him. She felt exhausted and the past few weeks had drained her of what remaining energy she had left. However after all the vodka this seemed like the final straw. She got to her feet shaking, an inexplicable anger rising in her throat.

"I can't believe you Leo. I should have guessed this was coming. Now Peggy Peabody has taken her exhibit back to New York your trying to give me the push again. Its just one excuse after another, I can see it in your face all the time that you never wanted me here. Anothe threat to your masulintiy, a powerful woman and to cap it a lesbian as well something no man is going to control through company, sexuality or otherwise. Well I will save you the bother. I quit!"

"Bette, don't be rash. Go home, now. I will call you tomorrow when you have calmed down."

Bette stood there shaking. She grasped the chair for support, tears preparing to roll down her face. Leo looked at her. She couldn't tell whether he was embarrassed, disgusted, angry or plain pitying. At that moment she didn't care, she was angry so very angry. Leo pressed the intercom button on his desk.

"Jimmy could you please come to my office and escort Ms Porter outside. Make sure that she calls a cab and doesn't drive."

He turned back to Bette.

"Your car keys please." He held out his hand.Bette didn't move.

"You have been drinking. Your car keys please." Bette stared at him then reached into her bag and flung the set of keys at him. If Leo had been about to say anything he didn't get a chance, for at that moment Jimmy arrived at the door. Without a word Bette turned and followed Jimmy out of the door and through the corridor to the gallery exit out into the city's mesmerising sunset.


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE

It was 9.00 when Jenny staggered home from the store, exhausted and ready for a night out on the town. It had been a long day and she was slowly but surely getting extremely bored with her job's long hours and poor pay. She sighed as she fumbled under the flower pot for the spare key. It seemed ridiculous, Tim had already moved most of his stuff out of the house in preparation for his move, but she was still occupying the tool shed. She remembered the embarrassing moment when he had forgotten to tell her he had potential buyers examining the property and she and Robyn had stepped out from some particularly hot shower sex to find Mr and Mrs Preston looking shocked through the window. Shoving her uniform into the laundry basket she hurried into her most revealing dress, rapidly applied some makeup and made her way outside. She glanced at her watch. Not bad only 9.45 she could make it to 'Twat' in plenty of time. Hopefully Alice and Shane would be there. She wanted to discuss finding a new apartment with them nice as the tool shed was it was not a permanent residence.

Just as she was about to walk down the road she noticed that there was a light on in Bette and Tina's. Then she checked herself, it wasn't really Bette and Tina's anymore. Tina had walked out three weeks ago and Jenny hadn't seen her return since. Alice had mentioned that Tina had moved in with her for a while but Jenny couldn't help feeling sorry for Bette. She had spotted her last week on her way out to work. Bette had been sitting in her Saab convertible in the drive way, hands on the wheel and the engine on but she wasn't moving. As a writer Jenny noticed a lot of things, and one of the things she had noticed was that Bette was wearing a lot more makeup nowadays, as if she was trying to hide something. She stared up at the house in awe. It was magnificent Bette did have very particular tastes and liked everything just so. Yet the house had somehow lost its love. There used to be a warmness that could be felt when you walked in the door it was a real home. Now it was cold and desolate and served only to shield its lonely occupant from an increasingly threatening world. Still Bette didn't normally get home this early, so Jenny moved over to the porch to get a closer look, her natural curiosity getting the better of her. Someone was curled up on the step. Jenny guessed that it must be some girl who had passed out drunk on their way home.

"Hey you," Jenny called out. "This is private property the owner is going to be pretty pissed if they catch you."

The figure didn't move.

"Hey." Jenny went over and pulled back the hair from the woman's face. Two chocolate brown eyes gazed unseeing back, blotchy and red.

"Fuck!" Said Jenny she couldn't really think of anything better to say. She looked down at Bette. There were touches of spittle around her mouth and she was breathing heavily.

"Fuck." Whispered Jenny again and rolled Bette onto her side. She grabbed her mobile and dialled a number. After a long session of ringing the phone clicked over to voicemail.

"Hi this is Alice Pierzecki please leave a message."

"Hey Alice it's Jenny, I'm going to be a little late, if Tina is with you could you please get her to call me on this number. Can you tell her that it is really important, thanks bye."

She hung up shoving the phone down into her bag as she did so. She looked down and Bette started to groan.

"Easy there Bette, don't sit up to quickly."

"Tina? Is that you?"

"No it's me Jenny. I found you lying on the porch. I thought you were unconscious."

Bette sat up and wiped her face. She looked at Jenny.

"Thank you." She said slowly, then looked away ashamed.

Jenny helped her to her feet,

"Come on we need to get you inside." She touched Bette's arm "Your freezing, look lets get you warm."

They moved into the house, Jenny with a comforting arm around Bette's shoulders sat her down on the sofa and wandered into the kitchen to make some tea. She looked around in amazement. The usually pristine kitchen was a mess with cutlery. But there was lots of un-eaten food lying about. It was obvious Bette hadn't been eating and when she did it was mainly take-out. There was a small photo frame lying on the counter and Jenny picked it up gingerly. It contained a colourful photo of Bette and Tina on a beach somewhere. Bette was smiling her famous 'Bette Porter smile' while Tina held her tightly in her arms. Jenny looked from the smiling woman in the photo to the distraught creature on the sofa, it was almost a stranger who sat in that room she felt. Jenny made a big cup of sugary tea and sat down beside Bette who sipped at it gratefully.

"Thank you Jenny" she said "I'm a wreck."

"What happened to you?" Jenny asked then winced; maybe Bette didn't want to talk.

Bette looked back at Jenny with curious eyes, as if she was really seeing her for the first time. She had been so wrapped up in her own life she had never really noticed her even though they were neighbours. To Bette she had always seemed so fragile and childish now however it appeared she had the strength that she herself so desperately needed.

"Jenny…don't answer this if it is too personal, but you remember when you and Marina were together and then …Tim found out. How did you cope?"

Jenny laughed.

"I didn't. That evening I went running back to him. I begged, no screamed at him to take me back. It was so embarrassing he was just coming out of the leisure centre and his whole swim team were watching from the bus."

"You know, I never had you pegged as the unfaithful type I guess it just shows how blind I am to the world around me."

"Oh but I was," Jenny interjected her compulsive inappropriateness taking over. "I was unfaithful to myself though more than anything. I thought I could be this humdrum woman trying to make it as a writer while I lived with my husband. Then Marina she opened this…Pandora's Box in my head. It was strange but it also felt in a way like she had released me."

Bette looked deep into Jenny's eyes for a moment a wave of understanding deeper than any mere words could express flashed between them.

"You think I am insane don't you?" Jenny asked,

"No, no. In many ways I think that you are right, at least for you." She sank back into the cushions a tear trickling down her cheek.

"Bette look at yourself. I don't want to be the one to say it but you are a mess. Me and Tim we had fun and I thought I loved him. You and Tina you didn't think that you were going to spend the rest of your lives together you knew it. What was it, really that pushed you over the edge to have that affair? You still love Tina don't you?"

Bette raised an eyebrow in spite of herself, "dare I ask how you got all the gory details?"

Jenny blushed,

"Well I was in the Planet and Alice came in for a coffee…" she trailed off.

Bette smiled and the tears rolled down her face,

"Alice is a journalist through and through, honestly that woman couldn't keep something to herself if her life depended on it."

Suddenly she broke down; the tears were rolling freely now dripping off her face into her mug.

"My God Jenny, I can't believe this is happening to be me. I have failed the woman I loved and I don't think she is going to take me back. But I can't even give up; I don't think I will have a life without her."

Jenny twisted her hands awkwardly; she didn't know what to do so decided that more tea would probably be the best bet. As she stood up to pick up the mugs she noticed her hands were shaking. As she placed them in the sink she looked around at the creamy walls. It felt strange she had never noticed how cold the house was before. It had many beautiful works of art but it was now sterile as if devoid of human influence. There were no longer any vases of flowers adorning the mantles and the absence of Tina's pink coat left the door pegs gaping. There was a raping at the door and Jenny shook back from her daydream. She fumbled with the latch and there on the step stood Tina.

"Jenny, I tried to call you but your mobile seems to be off. What's the problem?"

"Fuck," Jenny rooted in her bag and pulled out the phone, the small screen flashed up 5 missed calls and 3 new messages. As she looked up at Tina, clean and glowing she was suddenly drawn to Bette ragged and dishevelled in the corner. She opened her mouth to speak but found for once she had no words to express what she felt. As she turned to leave closing the door quietly behind her part of her brain craned to hear the words that were being spoken behind the glass. She knew she must leave as this was a story she was no longer part of but there was always that insatiable curiosity to find out what happened next.


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

Tina walked over and stood in front of Bette, her arms folded across her chest. Her new found dominance clashed for a moment with the wave of pity that spread through her. She made to move forward but then checked herself. Bette looked up into her eyes. Tears began to form in the corners as she saw her lover, no her life poised on the brink before her. This was the make or break moment she had been praying for but now it had arrived she had no idea what to do.

"Tina, look at me. I am a mess I thought I was in control but something was missing. But when you left I realised that I had it all and I threw it away so foolishly. I love you baby, I need you back, I can't survive without you!" she wiped her eye,

"You're not going to let my mistake ruin us are you?"

Tina just looked back at Bette; her arms folded and face set in an expressionless mask. Bette shuddered realising that the woman whose eyes she was looking into she no longer recognised. She sat down opposite Bette.

"Mistake." She rolled the word around for a moment it sounded oddly provocative in silent house.

Bette looked over towards her, that hand which had been placing its weight on her for months tighten its crippling grip. She bent forwards.

"I felt so isolated since you lost the baby, you pushed me away and, and…" she tailed off.

Tina looked down at her, deep into her eyes, her customary loquaciousness gone.

"I loved you more than anything. I left my boyfriend for you and in seven years, turned my world completely on its head. I have looked into your eyes and never felt so happy as when were together. Then that night at the gallery opening in one moment all that happiness became a lie…"

"Tina I…"

"Just listen will you! Its always about what is happening in the world of Bette, how can you be so sensitive in some ways and never see what is right under your nose. We lost our baby, and as if that devastation wasn't enough you cheated on me. That night when I got home all I did was sit on the floor and cry. I cried because I had lost our baby boy, but also because it was another way I had let you down."

Tina's shouts subsided, she almost whispered.

"What was it I did wrong?"

Bette began to weep; she sank down to the floor on her knees. But then something seemed to stir in her. She stood up and walked over to Tina placing her hands on her shoulders. The firmness of her grip surprised even her.

"Don't you ever say that. Don't you ever say that it was your fault, we have gone on for too long letting you take the blame for my mistakes and deficiencies." The atmosphere around them was electric.

"All those fucking awful self help groups we went to and I was scared. I was scared to admit that I was weak and not strong as I had always believed so I hid behind you and made excuses that you needed protecting. All the while fucking Dan Foxworthy going on in his self-righteous way, diverting us away from what was really happening. But now all I can do is lay myself bare for your forgiveness."

Tina looked at what remained of her lover, the once beautiful skin sallow and worn. Eyes teary and her fingers cracked and stained. Was this still Bette Porter? But Tina already knew the answer. She could still feel that spark that had seven years ago drawn her back to the Bette Porter Gallery to find her missing earring, knowing that this moment was going to change her life forever. She reached up and grabbed Bette's head and kissed her. Bette didn't move, it was as if the weight of months had suddenly been lifted from her shoulders and wave after wave of relief flowed through her. She held Tina close to her, so tightly it was as if she would escape. They kissed again passionately and began walking to the bedroom crashing into the myriad of objects littering the house.

"I guess I shall have to re-hire Sonya." Bette said as they fell through the bedroom door fighting to remove each others clothes, tripping over the litter that covered the floor.

As they fell backwards onto the bed, Tina ran her hands down Bette's open shirt, kissing the exposed skin, before making her way down her body.

Her head bent back on the pillow Bette whispered softly

"I missed you so much," before she moved to accept Tina's embrace.

- FIN -

Disclaimer: I obviously do not own any of the characters of the L-Word and the story is ntirely fictitious based on unseen events in the development of the characters. I would like to thank Ilene Chaiken for creating such great characters to write about.


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